Let it Go!
The holidays are officially here, and for me, that’s not necessarily a good thing.
As a single mom with a very busy law practice and a couple of other businesses underway, any disruption to our regular routine can wreak havoc.
Inevitably, there will be an early pickup at Kaia’s school that I will be unaware of until the morning of and I’ll be scrambling to get her home. Or, Noah’s preschool will be closed on a day I didn’t think about and I’ll be without childcare at the last minute.
Luckily, I’ve started living very much in the moment and I’m doing a lot less projecting into the future.
You know what I’ve noticed? I’ve noticed that all the same things still happen - but, I don’t stress about them in advance AND it ALWAYS works out.
So, if you want to know the true secret to my success - and, a lot of you have asked me about this - Alexis, how in the world do you do everything you do?
You can do it too! Just stop worrying about things so much. Do the very best you can to plan for what might come up with the realization that you are going to miss something. And, it might be something that seems important.
But, in the grand scheme of things - it’s ok!
The secret to my freedom is that I’ve begun to truly accept my shortcomings. When I make a mistake I forgive myself. When I forget something I forgive myself. When my kids are raging mad at me about something, I forgive myself.
And, know what? Everyone around me treats me with a whole lot more love and acceptance as well.
So, this holiday season, my wish for you is to forgive yourself for anything that you’ve been too hard on yourself about. Let it go and give yourself the love you’ve been looking for.
Now I’ve got to run before I’m late for Kaia’s carpool!
Happy day to you.
Dedicated to Your Family’s Well-Being,
~ Alexis
PS If you are traveling this holiday season and you have not yet made sure your family would be taken care of if something happens to you, call our office right away; there’s still time to get this taken care of!
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I Just Love My Nosey Neighbors
Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
I’m not only taking a work break for the rest of this week, I’m also taking an email break. So, if you email me or my office, don’t expect a response until next week. 
Of course, if you are a client, the emergency cell phone is always on for you.
When I lived in Washington, D.C. during law school I was mugged during broad daylight riding my bike home from school one day and ever since then I’ve been a bit skittish.
One of the things I’ve always liked about living in Hermosa Beach is how safe I feel. When I lived down by the beach, I didn’t mind that my neighbors could hear my loud conversations because I knew that also meant they were there in case something happened.
Now that I live on a bigger lot with fewer neighbors I worry more. Well, as of last night, I realize I have nothing to worry about. There are still plenty of people around aware of what’s happening at my house.
Imagine my terror when I was woken from a dead sleep by a light flashing on and off outside my bedroom window. I thought it was the headlights from a passing car, but then I heard the banging. Oh my God, I thought I was going to die. My heart was pounding a million miles a minute.
I always sleep with the phone right next to me, so I grabbed it and prayed it wouldn’t be dead. It wasn’t! I called 911 and the hermosa beach police dispatcher answered right away. I breathlessly told her that someone was in my backyard.
My fear was only slightly tempered to hear that it was the police in my backyard. The police?!? What were they doing in my backyard?
Turns out, one of my neighbors had been walking by my house (it was only midnight, though I didn’t know that at the time) and saw two of the screens on my windows popped out and called the police to come check things out. The police had rung the bell, but I couldn’t hear it because I was sleeping at the back of the house.
So, THANK YOU nosey neighbors for watching out for me and for sending the police to my house. I appreciate your concern!
And, in the spririt of thanksgiving, I want to thank YOU for reading my weekly email newsletter week in and week out and for sending me such great feedback. And, even though I don’t have an opportunity to respond to all of the feedback, I do read all of it. So, thank you!
I also want to give public thanks to all of the people in my life who on a daily basis make it possible for me to be a mommy, run multiple companies and stay mostly sane, so in no particular order:
Thank you, thank you, thank you - Susan, Anna, Lexi, Nathalie, Emily, Jill, Bari, Lynne, Erin, Randy, Dave, Joanne, Todd, Marc, Tyson, Cindy, Judy, Abbe, Melody, Karen, Marion, Daniel, Karinna, Carla, Amy, Eric, and Gina - THANK YOU!
Enjoy your turkey and I’ll talk with you next week.
Dedicated to Your Family’s Well-Being,
~ Alexis
PS - Want to make your own gratitude list? You can do so at http://www.thegratitudelist.com
PPS - Kaia and Noah are looking totally different with their big kid haircuts. Kaia’s gone very short and Noah’s got a mohawk! Take a look at http://www.familywealthblog.com.
Noah Before 
Noah After
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Single Mom Errs - Tooth Fairy Facing Bankruptcy
I really can’t believe I’m sharing this with you, but I almost feel it’s my duty so that you will know what to say when your little one comes to you and tells you the tooth fairy is now giving out hundred dollar bills. Yes, you read that right - hundred dollar bills.
Kaia lost her front tooth yesterday. (you can check out her beautiful first grade smile on my blog at http://www.familywealthblog.com) And, the first “bad mommy” move was, I lost the tooth. 
Ok, it’s not really lost;it’s somewhere, I’m just not certain where. There was a lot of commotion when I picked Kaia and Noah up from their dad’s house and the tooth got misplaced in all the husslebussle.
So, I recovered from that one by writing the tooth fairy a very nice note letting her know that she should leave her surprise under Kaia’s pillow and she could locate the tooth with her fairy powers. Kaia was accepting of that. Oh, and we put all the left over Halloween candy to see if the sugar fairy would come too.
But, then, I fell asleep while I was putting Kaia to bed and woke up only when Noah was crying for me from his bedroom, and I fell asleep again getting him back to bed. I spent the rest of the night fast asleep in his room and of course forgot all about the tooth fairy and the sugar fairy.
I didn’t remember until I was just about to wake Kaia up for school and I began frantically searching for something, anything smaller than the only bit of cash I had in my bag - a hundred dollar bill! My options were a handful of change or the hundred dollar bill and I had to act fast because now Kaia was awake and out of bed and hadn’t yet rememebered about the tooth or the candy, but I could feel it coming any minute.
I quickly distracted her, ran into her bedroom, stuck the hundred dollar bill under her pillow and grabbed the note. I didn’t even have time to grab all the candy. And, just at that moment, she remembered. “Mom, the tooth fairy! What’d she bring me?”
“A Hundred dollars?!?!? Mom, the tooth fairy gave me a hundred dollar bill! I’ve always wanted a hundred dollar bill!” 
Kaia has her theory about why the tooth fairy left her a hundred dollar bill: She says the tooth fairy and the sugar fairy combined their funds. I said the tooth fairy must have had a vision problem, thought she was leaving a ten dollar bill and didn’t notice the extra “0″ on the end.
When your child comes home with the rumor that the tooth fairy is leaving thousands of dollars beneath children’s pillows and starts begging you to pull out his barely wiggly teeth, you can correct the misinformation - it was a hundred dollar bill left by accident when the tooth fairy thought it was a ten (or a one if that fits more appropriately into your budget).
Dedicated to Your Family’s Well-Being,
~Alexis
P.S. Are you part of a group or organization that serves parents who would benefit from learning 7 steps they can take right away to have the absolute peace of mind of knowing their children will be raised by the people they want in the way they want and never taken out of their home by the police if the unthinkable happens - all without going to see a lawyer?
If so, email susan@martinneely.com to get more information about having me come out and speak. And, if your organization is a nonprofit, let Susan know that as well because we can set up a fundraiser for your organization that will raise lots of money for your orgnaization and provide your members with loads of peace of mind!
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How to Get What You Want
I’m getting ready to go away at the end of this week. I’m going to be speaking in Atlanta at a seminar where I’ll be sharing the Kids Protection Planning Kit with parents across the United States who want to make sure their children are absolutely protected if something happens to them. I’m excited to be taking my message national.
I’ll be sure to let you know when the Kids Protection Planning Kit is available again for sale online. We’re revamping the website and it should be ready sometime in the next two weeks or so.
Last week I gave you a strategy for figuring out what you want. If you missed that email, you can always go back and read it on my blog. www.FamilyWealthBlog.com. And, hey, feel free to send any of your friends there who might benefit from my postings as well.
In fact, I’ve had several people ask me whether they can forward my emails to their friends, their clients and even their parents. In case you’ve been wondering too, the answer is - absolutely! The only thing I ask is that you please include attribution to me as follows:
| “Written by Alexis Martin Neely, Esq., Personal Family Lawyer, author, coach and mom. To receive Alexis’ FREE Weekly Family & Wealth Protection Tip, subscribe at www.familywealthmatters.com.” |
Ok, so this week, once you know what you want, how do you go about getting it?
I’ve discovered a fabulous system that I’ve obtained the rights to, which you can download for FREE from my blog.
The Ultimate Fast Action Success and Prosperity System that Never Fails is a 5 step system for getting what you want at blinding speed. My good friend Dave Dee created this system for himself when he was $15,000 in personal debt, $24,000 in business debt and jobless. Within 3 months, he was living out his childhood dream of becoming a very successful professional magician; within 6 months he was completely debt free – bought a new house, a new car, etc. – and since then he has shared this system with thousands of people across the world and their results have been equally amazing.
I know you will love the system too, so go download it for free right now. Look for Free Download. www.FamilyWealthBlog.com.
Talk to you next week!
Dedicated to your family’s well-being,
Alexis
P.S. My Chiropractor, Dr. Dave Noonan, at Arc of Life Chiropractic in Redondo Beach at the corner of 190th and PCH, is giving away an initial exam and x-rays ($250 value) for a 3 can min. contribution to their holiday food drive. This is a great opportunity to meet a great chiropractor AND contribute to a very worthy cause. So, go see Dr. Dave and let him know that I sent you. You can reach their office at (310) 379-3230.
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On a lighter note … happy “birth” day to me
Not only is it Halloween week, but it’s birthday time in the Neely house – Kaia’s birthday is Thursday and mine is coming up on the 17th of this month.
7 years ago, we were living in Miami, Florida while I clerked for a Federal Court of Appeals judge and I was 8 months pregnant. My body was clearly telling me that I wasn’t going to be pregnant for another 4 weeks as I was supposed to be. I didn’t know what was going to happen, but I knew I was having a baby soon.
That Halloween I was the right shape to dress up as a pumpkin, but instead of trick or treating, we went to the hospital to have a baby. It turns out my water broke a teeny bit and to be “safe” – the doctors decided it was time for Kaia to be born. Kaia wasn’t actually born until November 2 – tomorrow.
And, yes, I was in labor that whole time; until we finally decided a c-section was in order. It happens 29.1% of the time in hospital births, so I decided to use a birth center with Noah, but you’ll have to wait until March to hear that birth story. Happy Birthday Kaia!
We had Kaia’s birthday party at the office on Saturday and with 44 kids in her class, it’s a good thing we have such a big lawn! I’m so busy that I had no time at all to plan the party, so I used the party planning services of a good friend and client of mine – Karen Patton of Born to Be Wild Parties.
Karen made pulling off this party with apparent ease and grace a breeze. The key here is “apparent ease and grace.” Karen did all the work; I got all the credit – the perfect combination of delegation and recognition for the busy mompreneur.
Honestly, the only way I am able to run my business, raise my kids and not go insane is because I have help from some amazing people in my life. First and foremost, Susan Odle – you all know her as Martin Neely & Associates Client Services Director. I’d be hard pressed to keep the office going without her, that’s for sure. And, I’m blessed beyond belief to have Melody Elder’s daughter Anna helping raise my kids. What a gift Anna is to my family.
I found these special women the same way I’ve wound up with everything good in my life. Clarity about what I wanted. It’s the key to everything really. Every single time I’ve found myself with the feeling of missing something in my life, I’ve gotten real clear about what I wanted and it showed up – every time! Of course, sometimes getting clear about what you want is the hard part.
Here’s a strategy I use with great success. Spend time sitting quietly by yourself and in your mind imagine your life without fear - a life without fear of running out of money, a life without fear of not having enough time, a life in which you are totally supported for any decision you make by all the people around you. Then, consider what you would want under those circumstances. Try not to judge whatever comes up because whatever it is – it’s what you want and you never have to hide that from yourself.
And, the first step to getting what you want is knowing what it is. Next week, I’ll share with you the best strategy I know of to get what you want once you know what it is.
Have a great week!
Dedicated to Your Family’s Well-Being,
Alexis
PS – If you want all of the appearance of ease and grace at your child’s birthday party without any of the effort, call Karen Patton from Born to be Wild parties at 310.281.3386 or check out her website – www.BornToBeWild.Biz or email her at Karen@BornToBeWild.Biz. Karen couldn’t have made my daugther’s birthday party any easier for me – thank you Karen!
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